March, 2022

This installment of “This Month in Pun” is brought to you by Dylan Brine, “The Pickle Maker.” Located at 2007 Summer Salts Dr., Hand Springs, Pun.

All Month: March is Fine Arts Month at the Karramel Center in Pun City. This year’s performances include a Hip-Hop concert by Bum Rap (1st), hard rock from The Roxanne Boulders Band (2nd), show tunes from Sam and Janet Evening (4th),  a concert by Spanish song-stylist Bessie Mae Mucho (5th),  an evening of quiet hilarity with mimes Kent Tawknow and Ameena Boxx (6th), a Caribbean music celebration by Greg Gay and Cal Ipso (7th),  jazz stylings by the Caspar Jammers Jazz Band (8th), a demonstration of primitive tribal music by Logorhythms (9th), electronic music stylings by Techno Prisoners (10th), a poetry recital by Pun Poet Laureate Wordsworth Reeding (12th), the “Black and Blues” national tour by the Bruise Brothers (13th), the Pun National Symphony, featuring conductor Phil Harmonic (14th), an evening of prestidigitation with magician Allie Kazam (15th), a concert by the Cannibals, a stomach-acid rock band (19th), Southern crooner Bubba Baboo (20th), stand-up comedy by comics Hardy Harhar and Shirley Yujest (21st), a  concert by heavy medal band Iron Cross (22nd), a performance by the South Pacific dance troupe Ballet Hai (24th), the Pranzeran Dancers (25th), a ragtime piano concert by Ivory Tickler (26th), aria selections by vocalists from the The Grandol Opera (27th),  a concert by singer Bertha DeBlooz (28th), and a concert by a Country/Western trio (Shelby Cumming, Rhonda Mountain, Gwen Sheekums) (30th).  The city of MacTruck’s Citizens’ Band always concludes the month-long festivities by playing Handel (31st). Handel usually loses.

Elsewhere this month:

February 28-March 6:The Pun Industrial Trade Show (PITS) is held this week in Artich Oaks. Situated at the north end of Safen Sound at the junction of Jimmida Creek, the Alimentary Canal, and three railroads, Artich Oaks became an important trading and manufacturing center. The bustling city boasts corporate headquarters and manufacturing plants for such diverse industries as plumbing (Pharoah Faucets, Bryer Pipes), ceramics (Repp Tile and Thick Casa Brick), interior design (Micky Mantels, Carpet Diem, Guyger Counters, and Lou’s Stools), furriers (Fursthings Furs), paints (Howard Hues), tobacco (C. Garbutt Company and C.U. Inhale), distilling (Boot Liquors and Spirits of St.Louis). security systems (Sure-Lock Homes), utility sheds (Gimmee Shelter), publishing (Juan Ferdy Books and Imm Printing), computer software (Over Byte and Silicon-Carney), textiles (Storyteller Yarns, Knights and Wight Satin, DeLando Cotton, Vladmir Linen, National Velvet, and Al Packa Wool), optical equipment and lenses (Folsom Prisms and Saury Spectacles), electrical components (Ringaling Bros. Circuits, Heavenleek Wires, Hickory Switches, Ellendy Generators), and graphic arts (The Artist (formerly known as Prints)). You can see displays and product samples from these and other Pun companies and pick up brochures as well. If you’re looking for a different place to spend a day, it’s the PITS.

March 21: Crowds gather each year on this day to watch the Changing of the Garb ceremony at the Royal Palace in Pun City, when the Royal Militia changes from its winter uniforms into its summer dress right in front of everybody.

March 27: Odie Doodah Day is celebrated on the shores of Betonda Bay in north Pun. Discovered in the late 1500’s by English explorers Bob Talnag and Odie Doodah, Betonda Bay’s natural harbor served as a refuge from the turbulent waters of Kissov Depth. The bay’s first colony, Camptown, later became the town of Doodah. The village celebrates its founding each year on this date. Principal events are a horse race and wine-tasting festival. The Chamber of Commerce promises sufficient “wine to run all night and wine to run all day.”

All Month: The Sevend Wharves, located on Honorondo Bay in Pun City is celebrating its 29th anniversary this month with special sales at all its shops. Wharves manager Prince Charmine says of this bay-front reclamation project’s anniversary, “This one time sleepy dock area is now alive with shops and boutiques, so dopey bashful about visiting. And leave your grumpy disposition behind because being happy at the Sevend Wharves isn’t a difficult task. Sneezy one.”

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